Spiga

Save My Communicator

I am a Mobile Blogger. I post my blogs from the comfort of my Nokia 9300. Yeah The Communicator. It is old and dying and you can help me save it by donating any sum of money. Email me at kumarbac (at) gmail (dot) com and we can always work out the other details.

I Play Devil's Advocate



So I have these two Pictures in my bedroom. I am sure I was less than 3 years old when these pictures were snapped.
Mom saya "We(mom and aunt) wanted you to be dressed as Krishna and pose in Krishna poses. But what you did once we were at the studio was cry and make ruckus. So that's why we have a Krishna posing for the camera without his charismatic smile"

I say "I have always hated being under the limelight. Am not a very public person. So crying and making ruckus was to avoid that photo being taken. They say Children are God but I was negotiating the price of my soul, with Satan even then."
But whatever said "I love those childhood years,I really do."
P.S.: It is worth selling your soul to Satan. He is really a nice guy, just that we don't realize it.. For more details see these movies "The Devil's Advocate", "Bedazzled",and "Meet Joe Black"

When Venu met Sonu...

Disclaimer:
1 This is just meant to provide some tickles. I can even relate it to Cinderella and the Seven Dwarfs, So you should know
What to take in right sense
What to take in nonsense
And please click on AdSense(googles advertisement link)
'Cause a man gotta make his pence.
2 I am highly prejudiced about marriage as an institution in todays society.
**********************************************************************
Dedicated in fond Rememberance of
" Bachelor Venugopal Balagangadharan"
Who is a Brand Addict suffering from a serious disease called brand-o-mania, Who has had to do things the hard way (his words not mine). I bid you farewell brother from the XXX Zone!!!I Am sure you will be happier on the other side of the Altar.
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With almost all my friends married and most of the married ones having kids, the Bachelors Club just has a few members left.Nandagopal, Girish and me. That's it and it's unbelieveable. But it is a proud moment for me not only because I am still single, bald and no girl in her right mind wants to marry me, but mostly because Venu is engaged and getting married on the 1st of February to a pretty girl, Sunaina.
Yeah this is the story of "Beauty and the Beast."
Now upon time, there is living in Chennai city one payyan named Venugopal. We will call him vennu. Vennu always adivanging(smacked across the face) from twin brother and thituvanging(scolding) from parents. He grew up, studied BA (Economics) in The Harvard of the East and some how got into PSG to study Masters Program In Sarvadesa Vyabaram(International Business). Got good paying job but no girl marry him because all his friends calling him pichakarran (beggar).
One naal, he go for cousin's kalyanam in Paellakad. There meeting meeting future Father and Mother in law, The Beast (Vennu) in Aaruva Kollaru proposing to in-laws. Daddy moraching (dirty stare), but beast's confidence hypnotizes in-Laws, they are very impressed. So all fixed, he talks to ponnu by tholai pesi(telephone), Beauty paer sonu, Beauty agrees to meet beast in his kotai(castle, Banglore in this case), so that beast will not become mad and sappidufy(gobble up) her parents.
Beast ore jollu (drooling) in Banglore. But ore sweating also because beauty may say NO to his proposal. He taking her to some shady place (place with a shade, so that he stops sweating and starts stinking) and proposing. Beauty still not understanding Beast. But says YES, because beast looks like a nalla (good) beast and she needs to get away from beasts gappu (stink).
So they finally got engaged on November 1st 2007 in Paellakad,
So another Love story----->Proposition-----> Marriage At the Altar----->The Happy Life
I was in Paellakad for the engagement and got bits and pieces of stories from various sources, which have been stitched into a story form. Well all sources were compromised by Single Malt Scotch.
November 1st 2007, Paellakad was under a civil strife**.
**Civil Strife - Civil strife in Kerala is a day declared off BY Mallus FOR Mallus so that SOME Mallus can be put to sleep, eternally.
"Bachelor Party for Venu, with Shakeela and Tequila" Disclaimer:Only for those Horny people with an IQ of less than 10.

Other Related Posts

Jab they Shaadhied
BP,With Shakeela and Tequila


Whisky in a Kukri

That's a picture of my object of pride for a few years now. "Whisky in a Kukri."
With *Bhevadas* as friends, what can I expect them to gift me with. Even though I have the occasional drop of alcohol, I keep away from it. I don't need it to run(or is it ruin) my life.
So that bottle in the picture was a gift from "Aafiser" Major Nandhagopal, who's in our army's artillery wing. Location is a secret(Matter of National Security) So this bro calls me one late night here is the Coversation we had
N Nandhagopal
A Aravind
N - Dai Sotta. Eppadi irruka da?
A - Hey bro, doing great man. Whassup with you?
N - Nothing much da. No work here. Just drinking my way to glory. No fighting with this neighbour. Infact I have been talking to my counterparts across the border for some time now.
A - Dai Indhiya Thaayoda perumaiya solluda avangakitta (Tell them Mother India's greatness). Am glad you are interacting with them. Have you learnt their Language?
N - No No. I am teaching them **Madras Bashai** They seem to pick it up fast. Planning to make that side of the border into a "Little Chennai."
A - Very happy da. Chennai culture should spread far and wide. I am glad you are putting some efforts in that direction.
N - Dai I am coming to Chennai da.What do you want from here?
A - Machan, I have not seen snow in my life. Can you get me some snow?
N - Sorry da. Not possible. Tell you what, I will get you Quarter Whisky.
A - Machan, ****Manamgetta Monitoraa?**** Has it followed you all the way there. Adha kudicha Liverosis vandhu sethudiven da.
N - No No, What I am getting is 100 times more potent than that.
A - Ayyo so I can't drink it then. What's the use?
N - No da sotta,it is Whisky in a Kukri. Kukri is that knife used by Gorkhas.And No, you shouldn't drink it. You can keep it, and later it will become Vintage Whisky. It is an investment for your old age.
A - Oh cool da machan. I can display it in my room then. And yeah probably sell it when I am old.
N - Yeah, but you have to promise that you will not even have a whiff of it.
A - Gawd Pramise Machan.
N - Ok , Since I am coming on vacation, you take few days off and we will go visit our professors in Harvard.
A - No problem machan. Come fast. We will party all night and then spend the mornings with ***Kaameshwari***.
N - Ok da, sotta. By, BY
A - Take care Bro, Bye.
Some P.S.'s
* Bhevadas - No not Devadas, Even though he was a Bhevada. Bhevadas is Hindi for drunkards.
** Madras Bashai - Is Tamil which is spoken by people in Chennai. You might need a dictionary to understand what's being said. It's a mixture of several languages including Hindi. (Hear ye, my fellow rascist men and women from North India, We are not against Hindi.) Will explain the nuances of the language in another post.
***Kaameshwari is not a mami turned call girl. That's the name of a mess in West Mambalam which has served us piping hot filter Kaapi and kept us very happy.
****Manamgetta Monitor - Literally translated it means Respectless Monitor. Monitor (for those of you who have not drunk your way to the top) is a brand of whisky which is one of the cheapest in the country. It was priced at Rs.40 for a Quarter between 1997 and 2000. Current price is just Rs.58. This brand makes some people's life worth living.
Price Courtesy : TASMAC
My closest friends call me sotta (Baldy). No, it does not offend me. I have never had any funny complex because I have no hair left on my head. I am happy I save a lot time, money and energy. Moreover I believe in what's inside my head, not what's outside my head.
Strangers who call me sotta, thinking they are being very funny, I call them pottai. So beware of what you call me. he he he.(Actually I don't care)
And are you wondering about my time in Harvard. Don't... I will explain that in another post.

Saroja Samaan Nikalo...

Who is Saroja? Why do I always keep saying Saroja Saman Nikalo? So many have wondered and a few have even asked me. So to all the ignorant people.

Saroja was my Girlfriend in a previous birth. And we had an live in relationship. But one day she was not very happy with the way things were going and she propsed to me. Gawd... Now thats a sin ain't it. So I told her "Saroja Saman Nikalo..." ( Saroja Pack your stuff...). Thats the story for you.

Well they say that Karma follows you birth after birth. (Karma is just the reaction to your action) So now I am not happy with any of the women I meet. They are simply not my kind. Chatter Boxes I hate. and Invariably most women I have met are such chatter boxes that a few minutes into the conversation I am wondering if it is a Dialogue or a Monologue I am having. And women are surely not attracted to a person who is bald, has his ears pierced and thinks he is GOD.

So women hate me. It has been a given in my life till now. Some of my girl friends found a small part of me which they thought was a good person and thought they could find my lost soul, but sorry people. I have never been completely true with any one girl in particular.

Yeah, It is fun, when you have sold out to SATAN.

Welcome to the Layer Cake

You're born, you take shit.
Get out in the world, you take more shit.
Climb a little higher, you take less shit.
Until one day, you're in the rarefied atmosphere,
And you've forgotten, what shit even looks like.
Welcome to the Layer Cake.

From the movie Layer Cake.

Greatness

Be not afraid of greatness, Some are born great, Some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them

Finally woke up

As a child my sleep pattern was awesome. I used to be up by 0500 hrs. But all the knowledge gained over the years has made me a very sleepy person. My parents have tried hard to help me change my erring ways, but the grownup in me does not want to listen to their words.
 
It was during my stay in Delhi that I experienced life and got to live it, the way I wanted to. I used to sleep when I wished and get up when I wanted to. There were days and nights, when I would skip the sleeping process. Somedays I just would not get out of bed.
 
My work nights were even better. Yeah, as the lions that prowl the night, I used to sometimes prowl even for three nights without a wink. I always needed to have a good hunt before I could rest.
 
I believe "Sleep is for the dead." So if I am mentally doing great, I don't need to sleep much. But with mental death all I want to do is, sleep sleep and just sleep.
 
So too much knowledge especially from books makes you a very sleepy person. Now I am trying hard to undo all that learning. Ctrl Z Ctrl Z Ctrl Z Ctrl Z... Finally waking up to the realities of life.

The Domesticated Night Owl

I have been a night eater most of my life. Just love to wake up in the middle of the night to eat dry fruits, cheese, maggi, biscuits, original Thirunelvelli Halwa,
 
I have tried to get rid of this habit but it has stuck on to me. It is supposedly a disease that is stress related and it is called Night Eating Syndrome ,NES in short.

Night eating syndrome signs and symptoms
* The person has little or no appetite for breakfast. Delays first meal for several hours after waking up. Is not hungry or is upset about how much was eaten the night before.
* Eats more food after dinner than during that meal.
* Eats more than half of daily food intake after dinner but before breakfast. May leave the bed to snack at night.
* This pattern has persisted for at least two months.
* Person feels tense, anxious, upset, or guilty while eating.
* NES is thought to be stress related and is often accompanied by depression. Especially at night the person may be moody, tense, anxious, nervous, agitated, etc.
* Has trouble falling asleep or staying asleep. Wakes frequently and then often eats.
* Foods ingested are often carbohydrates: sugary and starch.
* Behavior is not like binge eating which is done in relatively short episodes. Night-eating syndrome involves continual eating throughout evening hours.
* This eating produces guilt and shame, not enjoyment.
 
Yeah so thats one cool way to have a syndrome. Yeah I seem to have most of the symptoms but I have never felt any guilt or shame about this. But then how do you get treated for this??? Any suggestions... I just finished eating some cheese and biscuits... I need help. Some one help me. Ha Ha Ha...

My first MOBLOG

Yes... I did it. This is my first mobile blog or MOBLOG as it is called. Pretty excited about it. Now I will have the freedom to write and publish my thoughts on the go and still make people think I am doing something real important.
 
Dont' know who will read these...