Nokia - Conning People The Nokia 1108 Story

Anyone can buy a white elephant,
But keeping it white takes a lot of effort!!!

So said some clever guy. So while you wonder why I am saying things like Nokia, Conning and White Elephant I realized I am crow shitting you people. I am just saying a bunch of crap, let me get to the point...

If you have read my Very FIRST POST, you will realise that I blog from the comfort of my Mobile Phone. Anywhere kind of blogging.(I've become senile, so I have to write things down immediately, lest... forgot what I had to say,am definitely senile) The phone is a NOKIA 9300 Communicator. Fans of the Communicator Series will realise this is a true blue business phone. And my life revolves around this dude. Anyways... even though he is a trusty phone, because of my non existent handling skills, he is all cracked up physically. Mentally he is as fit as a cat with who can smell the difference between Parmesan, Camembert and Ricotta cheese.

So I decided to find how much I would have to shell out to fix him up. Meanwhile my Grandfather's Nokia 1108 had run into troubled waters.(No....Not Water Logging, Just Not Powering On) So had to fix his phone too.

Place : Nokia Care, Mount Road Opp Anand Theatre

Time : Noon, April 2008

I am going to try Tanglish. i.e. Tamizh written in English. An English Translation is available in brackets.

As I walk in to the store I am stopped by a security guard.

SG - Enna vennum saar???(what do you want saar???)

Me - Neenga dhan vennum.(I want you.)

SG - Saar vilayadadheenga.(Saar don't play with me)

Me - Hayyo... hayyo... Mobile repair shopla edhukaga varuvanga???(Why do people come to a Nokia mobile service centre)

SG - Mobile repair pannava??? (To fix a Nokia Mobile)

Me - Ayyo, En Kaelveeku, maru kaelviya? Enna Kodumai Saar Idhu. (You are questioning my question???)

SG - Enna Phone model?(Which Phone Model?)

Me - (Showing him my grandfathers phone)Nokia 1108

SG - Saari saar idha laan inga repair pannamaatum. (Saari saar, we don't repair this model)

Me - Oh anna, neenga meesai mayilsamy and also repair rangasamya...???(So dude, you are Moustache Mayilsamy and Repair Rangasamy???)

SG - Illa naan security gawd mattum dhan... Indhanga unga number cheetu...Appadi poyi ukarunga (No I am just a security Guard...Here is your numbered ticket...Please sit there)

Me - Thank you...

So I grabbed the numbered ticket and got a seat. And I started chanting "Mera Number kab aayega???" and presto I was called within 5 minutes... Kind of surprised with the efficiency of the system they had in this place. But...Then...

Now another guard at another door examined the ticket given by the first guard. I think they have tried something something like a cinema hall. Someone issues a ticket. Then one guy checks it and let's you in and helps you settle in a seat.

SG2 - Saar Counter Number 4.

Me Wokay...

Now I am sitting in counter number 4 which apparently looks like a place where I would probably sell drugs to hardcore druggies. And I am sitting face to face with a service representative.

SR - Yes saar how can I help you? (after that question she was talking to her neighbour and fixing some night lamp)

Me - hmmmm Indha phone ON aga matingidhu...( This phone is not powering ON)

She just continues doing her stuff.

SR - Yes saar How can I help you???

Me - (Thinking) Should I take her trip starting now, Naah probably she is distracted... Don't lose your temper dude.

Me - Oh Phone ON aga matingidhu.(Phone is not powering On)

SR - Oh Indha modela saar. (Oh... this Model)

(And snatches the phone from my hand with a smirk on her face. Ofcourse it is the poor Nokia 1108.)

Now she asks her neighbour. Do we repair this model. For which she gets a "Yes but it will be treated as out of warranty."

SR - Saar repair panna Rs 600 aagum and 15days minimum aagum... (It will cost you 600 Rs and 15 days to fix it)

Me - Ok... But what exactly is the problem?

SR - Saar neenga dhan phone On aagilaenu soneenga.(Oh you told me it is not powering on)

Me - Yeah I know what I said. But nee eppadi ma conclusionuku vandha...???(But how did you come to the conclusion...???) about Rs 600 and 15 days minimum.

SR - Illa saar...(No saar...) this is the normal procedure.

Me - (Thinking) This female is just bull shitting me.She has no clue about what to do. Her trip starts now!!!

Me - Wokay let me help you. Will you check the battery please?

SR - Oh OK saar...

Now she turns to her neighbour again and asks for a test battery, which she fixes in the phone and switches it on and Voila!!! The phone does turn on. WOW!!!

Me - Is it still gonna take 15 days? Aama indha phoneukku speciala Nokia la battery pannuveengala??? Would you kindly emboss my name on that battery...

SR - No saar just change the battery. OK saar... (With a gigglish voice)

Me - Adhu evalavu aagum???(How much will that cost???)

SR - Rs 600 saar.

Me - Oh is it like take anything for 600 Rs...Strange. OK but is this battery good enough.

SR - No sir, it has gone bad...

Me - Idhu Phone repair Centrea, illa Josiyum centrea...(Is this a phone repair centre or do you guys crystal gaze?)

SR - Enna solreenga saar...?(What are you saying saar...?)

Me - Oh you are making a lot of predictions... (At this point I should have walked away from that place...But....)

To be Contd...
Photo Courtesy : www.fonearena.com/nokia-1108_40.html